Hilarious Max

"Ger your billion back America" I over heard Max say this to himself one day while playing (if I'm reading this 20 years in the future, this is a line from a commercial that keeps playing, something about tax refunds.....)

Thanks to Max I've had to add a couple of new house rules:

No shooting fart guns in the house

No smelling people's butts

One day I was laying down, mentally prepping myself to get out of bed and ready for the day when Max comes up to me and tells me, while naked and holding his pants and underwear, "The brown streak strikes again!" Jason gave him this nickname. Eww. Boys are gross. But I can't help but love them for some reason.

A new common phrase (like several times a day sometimes) "I don't mean to interrupt but...." At least it's polite and not talking about butts.

Back from when we were carpooling in preschool we were in the van with his friend Caden. I ask them how school went and all the sudden they both started talking excitedly. Apparently their was a spider inside the school and they had to tell me every little thing. It's size, color, speed, random spider triva. You name it. Oh the preschool life.

I was cracking down on Max's picky eating and insisting he had to eat what I made and that there was not going to be anything else (it was something kid friendly and pasta-y  Not like squid or anything) Well he wanted dessert but didn't want dinner and I told him that wasn't happening so an epic crying fit ensued. After calming down so he could talk, in between wimpers (because mind you, I'm torturing the kid with threats of having to eat pasta) he says, "Just looking at that pasta makes my eyes steam! My tears get so hot when I scream." I almost burst out laughing and calmly told him maybe he shouldn't scream then. Didn't work.

Max was in the bathroom and taking a while so I ask him what's up thinking he needed toilet paper or maybe he was goofing around in the sink or something.  His reply? "There's just too much inside my tooshie!" I hear ya.

While Max and the boys were at the Rowley's Ashley overheard Dallas say, "My name is Inigo Montoya you killed my father prepare to die." Max's then answered with "I AM your father." Hilarious.

Driving back from church we were talking about how it's sad when someone dies but because we have the gospel we know that we can be with loved ones again. Levi, "But some people don't believe that." Max pipes in, "Yeah some people believe when you die you turn into a monster but we know you don't turn into a monsters."

Coming out of the bathroom. "I saw bubbles in my pee because I just drank soda." So logical.

We played the song 'Everything is Awesome' from the Lego movie and then told him it's time to clean up but don't worry because everything is awesome.  Max "Except sins, those are bad and then we can't live in heaven."  I wish I could see in their brains sometimes.

We were at the Starrs house for the 4th of July and Max and Addison kept jumping off a stool into a small kiddy pool. As Max gets up for his turn he looks over to his cousin  and says, "This is how a real man does it." Apparently he'd been saying that all morning while he was playing all the girls. Where does he get this stuff?!