- Life has been kind of crazy lately not because anything more has been added to my plate (besides t-ball) but I have been knock out exhausted the past month and a half/two months. I mean waking up after 8-10 hours of sleep and still wanting to just sleep all day. Even after naps and long rests all I've wanted to do was sleep and I've found myself going to bed at crazy early (for me) hours at 10 or so. Normally it's 1 or 2 am for me. It's been frustrating because while I usually don't feel like I get what I want accomplished in a day, I really wasn't getting much more done than the bare necessities. That and I haven't wanted to eat much of anything and the smell of cooking meat makes me want to vomit. Ahh pregnancy, I forgot what those cute little leeches do to me the first couple months. Luckily I have been feeling a bit more refreshed when I wake up and am able to get more done in the day and 2nd trimester is almost here, yea!
- Speaking of babies, the boys love to see how far along I am. I have an app on my phone which has a picture and tells how big baby is and learning about how it is growing. Max is still extremely insistent it's a girl. "Heavenly Father knows, and Jesus knows and the angels know and I know." He tells me that a lot. Levi is thinking it's a boy. I'm fine with whatever and everyone wants a girl for me but to be honest it is kind of intimidating because I don't have any real experience with little girls. I've watched a few a couple of times but not long. They are just so different from boys, who I kind of feel like I know a little bit about, I mean I've lived and breathed little boys for 5 1/2 years. But again I can totally see the plus sides of a girl. Time will tell I suppose.
- A month or so ago I was extended a calling and I turned it down. Never in my life did I think I would turn down a calling and I always told myself I would always be willing but when I sat there and it was given to me I was completely tongue tied and couldn't physically get the words 'yes' out. Normally, despite my hesitations about a given calling and weather I felt up for it, I was always able to say yes then felt good about it but with this one I just couldn't do it and it didn't feel right. Even after thinking about it all week I tried to pin point why. Maybe it was because I really liked my new calling as a teacher, which is something I have never done before as a calling and have always, with the exception of a year in the primary presidency, done either something activities or music related (the calling they were giving me would be music related), maybe it was partly because I felt completely out of my league musically. I think people think I'm more gifted with music than I actually am. Don't get me wrong, I love it and can sing pretty well naturally but I don't have much other skills as far as music goes. Also there were other personal reasons which I won't delve into. After thinking and thinking I just couldn't pin point why, it felt completely wrong and I couldn't say yes to it so I didn't. I now am trying not to feel guilty feeling like I've let someone down in some way but it is what it is and I'm moving on.
- I'm getting excited for summer, we'll see if I'm changing my tune after a couple weeks of all day long with two super busy boys and being prego. At least is the second trimester which is my easiest. But we have lots of things planned and I can't wait for the sun to shine.
- This year is friend birthday party years for both boys so we have been working on party planning for far too long. As I plan I know I am going overboard and suspect I am kind of crazy. On the day of I know I've gone overboard and afterwards thinking about it and looking at pictures I am convinced that I am a lunatic and who in their right mind would spend that much time on a kids party. The answer is me. I like organizing things and doing fun things for kids and they always have such fond memories of them. And the way I figure it at the most I can only do 9 or so of these for each kid and then they're gone and that's assuming they'll let me do it when they get older. So this year it's a Lego party for Max and Wild Kratts for Levi and we are all pretty excited about it. Hey, at least I know I'm crazy. One day I'll seek professional help.
- Mothers are natural worriers and I'm no exception. As the school year finishes I am wondering what to do with Levi next year, it's a heavily debated topic in the house between Jason and I. Part of the reason I worry is because out of all his classmates (I know I shouldn't compare) his handwriting and fine motor skills are honestly at the very very bottom. Also it is SO hard for him to sit still for any amount of time. Heck he can hardly stand still for any amount of time he's just an excited boy all the time and loves to be moving and talking all the time so it makes me very nervous to have him go from 2 1/2 hours of school to 6 1/2. He is the youngest in his class and if he had been born 3 days later he wouldn't even be in kindergarten until next year so while he is physically the size of some first or second graders he is still probably the youngest kid in school. It just makes me very worried and nervous about everything. But again, it could just be me, I really good about worrying things unnecessarily.
There it all is. Well at least some of it is out of my head so now on to other things......
1 comment:
Loved reading about all you guys are up to! I cannot wait for you to find out what you're having. Either way-it'll be super exciting. And I get the intimidation on the girl thing, so funny how that works after having boys for so long.
And the school thing-I think that's how our mom brains work. I worry about everything-it's natural. Hopefully in the next 6 months he'll grow and mature a bit more and will be able to better handle the longer schedule. That definitely is a HUGE change though!
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